Born June 12, 1990, Michael Anthony came into our lives 22 years after Jane and I were married in a small Catholic church in Manitowoc, Wisconsin. It would be two years before Vietnam, during which time my first son was born, and more than twenty-two years before our noisy 90-year old Victorian home would provide a safe haven for our newest addition, amidst the joy and happiness of a large family already abundantly-blessed with five children.

Michael was a ‘blue baby’, coined for the color he quickly became during the birthing process as the umbilical wound crazily around his neck. An alert Dr. Tom Skidmore pushed the assisting nurse aside and promptly adjusted the errant cord as quickly as it had coiled, turning Michael’s darkened complexion to a nice, healthy glow. Michael was a joyful gift to us all.

18 years later, Michael, again blue – Utah State University blue – left us behind as local Sigma Nu chapter members initiated (pledged) him into a local fraternity with blue poster paint and an illicitly-gained bottle of vodka. When it came time to save Michael’s life, everyone deferred; the threat of legal consequences of underage drinking was far too intimidating. Michael’s words to me the week before will be forever too regretful to bear. Dad, these kids look up to me. They will do anything for me. Michael paid for their fear with his trust and his life. I CARE. I am HONEST. I have COURAGE. I LOVE others. I am a true FRIEND.

Our son loved to travel, frolic with his two canine buds – Jack and Jill, gear up for winter snowboarding trips with his brothers into the surrounding mountains, enjoying family get-togethers with long-time, closely-held friends, and join in family road-trips to Seattle, Lake Tahoe, San Diego, Phoenix, Virginia City, Nevada, Colorado Springs, and Denver.

Michael, our son and brother, was cheerful, humorous, trusting, faithful, endearing and thoroughly cherished and loved by all of us. With Michael’s oldest sibling being 40, Michael brought up the rear, always cuddled, humored, and teased by five doting brothers and sisters.

While Michael is gone from our presence, he remains with us always in heart and mind. We use our son as an example of how we live, how we love, how we value and cherish each other and those who we hold close. If lives can be saved through Michael’s death, we can all recognize that we are upholding the best of Michael – what he offered in his lifetime and after – The Michael Starks Creed of Friendship.

Are you a true friend?